Welcome to my Blog! It has been awhile since I have written anything and it truly has been heavy on my heart! I will blog at least once a month, sometimes more depending on content and what is truly on my mind!
My word for the year: Boundaries! This is the first year I have actually chosen a word for myself. Do you have a word? The word boundaries has so much depth and so many levels! Let”s take a look at the definition of boundaries:
Boundaries is a line that is imaginary. It is a separation. It separates your physical space, needs, your feelings as well as the responsibility you have toward others. Having boundaries are how other people treat you: meaning what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. Boundaries are needed because without these imaginary lines people will take advantage of you.
Boundaries & You
Here are what boundaries will do for you:
- Being your true self! You have the right to have your own feelings and making your own decisions without trying to please others.
- Self Care at it’s finest! This has been a tough one for me and is a struggle but I am getting better! Respecting your own needs and knowing ( ok this is what is tough) you are not responsible for the people in your life how they behave or feel! Listen to this! They are responsible! When you have boundaries you allow yourself to stop worrying about how others feel and makes them responsible! This is huge! Do you feel you have to many irons in the fire? Do you take on too much? Saying no is tough! Say no to those things that do not align up with what you want! This is going to be a constant with me! How about you? Do you say yes, just please others?
- Being Real! having real expectations! We need to know what is expected. This takes communication! Telling people what you expect
- Feeling safe! Creating boundaries makes us feel safe and secure. It keeps us from things that maybe uncomfortable or hurtful.
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What is holding you back?
- Fear! The fear of doing something different or new! Here are questions to ask: What are you afraid of? The thing your afraid of is it likely to happen? What will happen if you do not set boundaries? What will happen if you do? Fear is something that we all have! Trust me I know! Sometimes it takes me awhile to get over the fear, but asking these questions helps me see if I am in a situation I need to get out of or just stuck in a rut.
- low self love. Feeling unloved or unworthy. I have been there we all have at some point. Not knowing your worth you will always put others before you. It is not selfish to put your needs before others! This is how we earn and get respect! Take care of your needs first and foremost! As women, this is tough because we care for so many people that our needs get lost. Make you a priority! Do something you have always wanted to do! Take that dance class, take that walk, have a girls night!
- pleasing others Yes, this has been me! Trying to please everyone and hating conflict. This is why I need boundaries! You can not please everyone!
Boundaries are about what feels right and what does not feel right! The other day Paulette Rees-Denis sent this to me and I wanted to share her to end:
“Boundaries are physical, but most importantly energetic. They are a commitment to honoring yourself. Do not allow within your energetic space what doesn’t feel right, loving or aligned.” Sophie Gregore
Boundaries are: self love, protection, are divine birthright, honor, worthiness, strength, compassion, empowerment, balance, accountability,abundance. Wow love these words! Don’t you?
I would love to hear from you! You can comment and lets talk!
